The Curse of Self-Limiting Beliefs

In many ways, the beliefs we have define the people we are. Whether positive or negative they define how we interpret and react to each and every situation we experience. Usually it is easy to tell the difference between our positive and negative though, but one type of beliefs, self-limiting beliefs, can often fall into a grey area where they are difficult to realize.



One subset of self-limiting beliefs is very dangerous because they masquerade as positive beliefs that have some potential benefits even though they still limit our over all potential. These beliefs often come in the form of "I can still do this even though I can't do that" or "Even though blah blah blah holds me back there are other ways I can accomplish this." Both of these forms of though may affirm that we can do something, but they limit the range of possible approaches we have to accomplish it.



There are also much more obious self-limiting beliefs. For instance one might think to himself "She would never go out with a guy like me." or "I will never make that much money in my life. Both of these may very well be true, but just as easily as they could be true, they could also be false. If you limit yourself to not trying, how will you ever know?


The negativity associated with these beliefs may not be immedietly noticible because it is implied from the segment of possibilities that we believe we "can't" do even if the belief expresses itself in a positive way. In other words if were to have a problem with walking forwards for some reason, the belief that I could walk to my car backward instead would be a self-limiting belief. This implies that I "can't" walk to my car forwards, and thus I am intentionally excluding the possibility of walking forward because I am afraid to do so. In this way, the limiting belief gives me an excuse to only walk backwards because I can, allowing me the to more easily put off learning to cope with walking forward comfortably. Now I know that is a stupid example, but it explains the general idea very well.

You may be wondering how you can know if a belief is a limiting belief. You can start by thinking of a situation you are uncomfortable in. What beliefs do you have about your ability to deal with that situation? How would normally act and what would you say. Next think about what your internal dialogue would be telling you. From this you should be able to infer how your beliefs limit you to the resources you normally have available to you and exclude the other possibilities.

Once you have identified your limiting believes, you'll need to find a way to expand your possibilities. Sometimes just understanding what was holding you back, and that there are other possibilities will be enough. In other cases you may need to boost your self-esteem, or learn new things to open up new possibilities. No matter the case, identifying, and coping with your limiting beliefs will definitely open new possibilities for you.